Ashly Brady

Fake it till you make it, a phrase I will always live by. I have been thrown into so many different positions, roles and fields that I’ve learned, with enough time and exposure to something you will eventually get the hang of it. All you really need is some confidence. Confidence is an important factor that contributes to our overall well-being, personal growth and success in all different aspects of life. Of course we’re going to experience moments of self-doubt, I experience self-doubt on the regular, but having a strong sense of confidence is what empowers us to overcome self-doubt and challenges, pursue our goals, and honestly provides us with more satisfaction in our overall life. 

The current role I am in, I have been in for a little over two years now and prior to it my experience was mostly nannying and retail. I had no idea how to write a professional email, fax documents, navigate the systems and softwares we use, or even how to place an order for office supplies. While I have much more responsibilities now than what I started with, I did not think I would have even progressed to where I am now. Aside from the “fake it till I make it” method,  one way that really helped me get as far as I am now was having people around me that saw my potential and supported me. I am thankful to have had a good leadership team that showed me the ins and outs of our practices and operations and who outwardly acknowledged my abilities and qualities. Once I understood how to do things and felt good about the work I was doing, the support and feedback then showed me that I was actually producing quality work and I can say that even though I still make mistakes, I’m confident in my work and my ability to do my job well and for any other future job I’ll have. 

Another way I’ve worked on growing my confidence and what is probably the most challenging thing for me is reworking negative self-talk. I’ve always put a lot of pressure on myself and when I don’t live up to my own expectations or the expectations others have of me then I can be hard on myself, which overtime usually leads to a lack of confidence.​ I used to think I needed to figure out how to completely minimize these thoughts, but the reality is they’re always going to be there. The important thing to focus on is what you do with those thoughts. For me I like to give myself grace, trust that I know what I am doing and recognize that I can’t be on my shit all the time. A recent example of this happened at work actually, we’ve been really busy and I put off an assignment I had been working on that probably shouldn’t have been put off as long as it was and I kinda got called out for it. I started thinking to myself how incapable I am at doing my job, how my boss hates me, thinking I’m going to get fired, or I’m not reliable, which were all very irrational thoughts. While I initially had those thoughts, I reminded myself I know what I’m doing and for the future I just need to be more mindful of how long I put something off and then I moved on with my life. Overtime, the more you rework the way you talk to yourself the easier it becomes to get over the negative self-talk. 

In addition to reworking self-talk, embrace and celebrate your success, abilities and accomplishments both small and big. Also, let others celebrate you!  The more we celebrate ourselves or we let others celebrate us, the more we pour into our own cup and we feel good about ourselves. I’ve been leaning into this a bit more because it’s not normal for me to celebrate myself or let others appreciate the things I do. I’ve always been in a mind set that the things I’ve accomplished are just things I’m supposed to do but the reality is they are moments that are worth acknowledging and so I’m trying to let others and myself celebrate my wins more often. 

Embracing a little “fake it till you make it” and finding ways to boost my confidence have both been beneficial to my personal and professional growth. Self-assurance is such an important attribute and through making small changes such as surrounding myself with supportive people, reworking negative self-talk and celebrating achievements I was able to become more self-assured and confident about myself.

I would love to know if confidence is something you have struggled with and what you do to instill confidence within yourself!

Until next time!

-Ashly Brady